Mother In Law Forwards

Thanks for the guest post by Jonathan Curtis I seriously feel like calling my Mother In Law and telling her (politely, of course), that we did not get clear internet lynn so that she could forward us every single ridiculous, bogus forward she comes across. I swear, if I get another chain email from that woman telling me how I am the rainbow in her life, and how I need to forward it on to all my friends or I’m not a nice person, I am going to lose it. I check my email, and it says I have 10 new messages. Okay, then. Only, 7 of them are forwards from my Mother In Law! I’m not even kidding. 3 are jokes, 2 are cautionary tales that were proven to be urban legends years ago, and 2 are lovey dovey pictures of animals and babies. Grrr! Delete, Delete, Delete. What’s worse is, every time I see her, she always asks what I thought of that joke, or that picture, or that quote. I’m like, oh, yeah, it was great. My goodness! It is crazy.

Retiring to Arizona

Guest written by our friend Trent Horton When my parents decided to retire and move to Arizona I was excited for them. I was a little sad that they wouldn’t be living close to me anymore, but I knew they were making a good decision for themselves. I didn’t get to spend that much time with them anyways, since I am always at work, and live on the other side of town. The only problem was that they hadn’t moved in over 30 years, and had no idea where to start with planning their move. I told them I would help them take care of things, so I got straight to work. I found them some good movers, and once that was done I got their utilities set up for the day they were scheduled to arrive. Then I searched direct tv scottsdale to make sure my dad wouldn’t have to go without his precious TV for an extended period of time. Since I wouldn’t be there to help get them settled in, I feel good knowing that I have helped them out. I know they will love their new place, and fit in just fine.

Vain

I'm a laser hair removal sorta gal.  But have you ever considered Botox?  I've learned the hard way in "never saying never."  They offer Botox injections at the Cosmetic Clinic in Port Melbourne.  Offer me a Groupon for Laser Hair Removal, and I'm all over it.  Offer me Botox and I'll decline if for no other reason than I'm just 25.

Can't say I'm too young for crow's feet and frown lines, though.  (Did you know it takes like a third of facial muscles to smile than to frown?  Being sad is hard.)  I don't think I have forehead wrinkles or smoker's wrinkles.  I'm sure by the time I've lasered my body I'll be ready for injections.  Ahh my life of vanity (not).

But speaking of which.  How much do you love Nars products!?  I just might wear makeup everyday from now on.

This post sponsored by Dr. Tass.  Not to be confused with Dr. Ass, which is what I first read upon going to their website.

Some chain link accessories for the fall

Guest post written by Karen Earhart Lately, I've been all about buying accessories. I think that it happened because I realized that I had way too many pieces of clothing and not nearly enough accessories to change up my look! So I decided to fix that and have been buying accessories like there's no tomorrow. But they are cheaper accessories from places like Forever 21 and H&M. Besides they're better to buy, especially for trendy stuff, because I'm not investing a whole bunch of money into jewelry I won't wear the next semester. But one thing that I need for fall but I don't have yet is some chain link accessories. I've seen so many of them in fashion magazines and blogs over the past few months and I really want to get in on that. I shopped around online with my wireless internet Las Vegas and found several accessories on the more affordable side. I ended up finding the perfect fall chain handbag that I think is just adorable. I love that the chain in it is like bonus jewelry when I wear it!

Home Loan

In the past two years I'm starting to finally learn about money.  I don't know how somehow that life skill went over my head, but it did, and thankfully it didn't kill us.  Mr Incredible has a good grasp on money, which negated my zero concept.  On the other hand, I always knew that I couldn't overdo it, but that was more for modesty reasons than anything.  I'm learning that coupons actually do save money, and not buying something is the best way to save money as well.  I'm telling you.  I was bad with money.  No.  Really really bad.  

When we were searching for a home, Mr Incredible told me what our mortgage limit could be, and what price tag limit that would put on our house.  Thankfully I respected what he said, and tried aiming lower than our top range.  First strand of smarts I've ever had about money.  I didn't really get everything that was going on in home loaning market, but I knew that I'd better have a cushion.  I'm glad I did, because it's hard to consider things like vet bills and online shopping when you make a loan budget.  Even though we are fine where we are, I still wouldn't mind downsizing for our next home.  Things before we owned a home that seemed so important are really not.  And as a good friend of mine says (a very half glass full friend, at that) "it's all how you look at."

We got a fixed home loan unlike an Aurora loan.  It's through our bank that I love and would recommend to anyone.  A man came and made me sign my name about 75 times.  The Aurora loan may or may not have had some shady business associate with it.  ie lawsuit.  Anyway, I digress.

So if you are looking into buying a home, and are terrible with money like I was, you should go onto a website like http://www.mymoney.gov/.  It's really anything you need to know about how to get on the path to financial not-failure.  Do that and Dave Ramsey.  Everyone loves Dave Ramsey.  I saw a car filled with Dave Ramsey quotes.  Him and Suze are where it's at.  Even though any time I pick up any of their books I kind of get overwhelmed.    They are like FlyLady for the financially messy.  And if you just take baby steps you'll realize how easy finances can be, and how, no matter what your situation it can be successful.  Like I (she) said, "it's all how you look at it."

No More Rack

Have you heard of NoMoreRack?  At first my odd ticking brain thought that it was a Breast Cancer Awareness site.  Something along the lines of "save the tatas."  Needless to say, I was hesitant to even look at this website, because I was nervous to see what it entailed, and what I would commit my brain and emotions to.  (Not much has changed, I'm still an emotional basket case).  Then my friend told me that she'd heard of nomorerack and had a $10 credit there for really cheap, nice jeans.  And once again, retail therapy prevails.  I went to the website and actually had to pick my jaw up off of the floor.  It's like a GLORIFIED Groupon site.  (apparently there IS something better than Groupon).  It's made up of awesome things (THINGS!  We all love things!) everyday at super super discounted prices.  I heart.  I die.  I'm staying up until midnight tonight to see the new deals.  iphone 4s for $60?  mhmm.  A Canon Rebel for $60?  yes.  (Mr. Incredible, take notes.)

I've had a hard time trying to find the nomorerack reviews, but you know my love affair with Martha.  And say no more, it's been featured on Martha's show, The View, USA Today, House Beautiful.  You must be joking me.  But no.  I'm sold.  And the sucker I am, I signed up.  And I'll update you tomorrow about how this sucker will be holding up tomorrow after staying up late finding deals on the computer.  I don't need drugs, I've got deals to get high on.

The one review I did read about was the nomorerack scam.  (Remember my Derrick blog flop?)  It got me nervous.  I knew it was too good to be true!  But apparently the site was hacked into or something, but it's all taken care of now.  It's as secure as any other online shopping (and cheaper, cheaper, cheaper!)  I'm really excited.  See you later when I'm decked out in Gucci and mac accessories.

Found

My fingers literally cannot stand typing this story over, because a) it's heard it too many times b) it's so mysterious there's really nothing to say.  In short, Mr Incredible picked up Peppy from Ohio.  We don't live in Ohio.  Ohio is three states away from us.  Weird.  Better than Austin.

But he came back with a cough, covered with fleas and so ungroomed that we need to shave him.  He also came back completely housebroken, really doesn't jump or bark anymore, and begs for food.  He might just be stunned.  But if these people who had him trained him, then I'm sure they'll need professional odor removal austin.  But they might not care about that sorta thing, considering the amount of fleas that were on him.  yuck.  But I'm really grateful to these people.  It's gotta be hard parting with our terribly behaved but awfully cute and fluffy dog.  Now he is well behaved and looks like a shaved fool.

'scuse the heavy breathing and the extra deep voice.  i was sick.

Last Post Update

Coincidentally, right after I wrote the last post, someone contacted me to my other gmail account through craiglist saying, "i think i have ur dog."  I replied back for info etc, and she hasn't contacted me back.  I'm dying.  I need a trade show pop up parked in an empty parking lot with Peppy's longing face on it so I can actually meet the people claiming to have my dog.  This virtual, un-contactable stuff is too much.  Could you imagine?  I could have pop up booths in different regions of New York with employees and police officers and PETA people.  FOR THE LOVE OF PEPPY.!  Pop up displays at Fairs!  Pop up trade show displays along the highway!  In Amish country, alongside the dried apples and mincemeat pie!

Oh, Peppy, you've taken my sanity.

Some Say Shaken Up, I Say PTSD

Do you remember last year I made the mistake of my life and bought a dog?  Well I topped that mistake.  Ready. Set. Guess.  WRONG.  I didn't buy another dog.  I lost the one we had.  FAIL.  And I've gone through exhaustive efforts trying to find him.  In my defense, I didn't really LOSE the dog.  He went missing from our back door.  Literally scratching at the door waiting to be let in, while I decided I would wait for a commercial to let him in.  We think it was a coyote.  They are not uncommon in our area.  So so so so sad.  We went searching for him that night, then I began driving around.  I saw a police officer, so I flashed my lights to signal him to pull over.  When he did and asked what he could do, I replied, "our dog went missing"  I started sobbing and said, "I didn't even like him!!!"  Officer responded, "Ma'am, did you say that you don't even like your dog?"  "yes!"  And so it goes, the dog that has literally left me in a heap of tears of frustration has now left me in a heap of desperation.  I've called every police station in the area, flyers, put out our blankets with Mr Incredible's cologne on it (because he was more partial to him than me.  I have no idea why.), visited every shelter, SPCA, craiglist, etc.  No luck.  It's been about 5 weeks now.  AND for all you who think that he ran away.   Peppy never runs away.  A) his electric (controversy!) collar was on B) his breed is known for always following around their owners, and never leaving their side.  C) he always always always comes when he's called (only thing he was *moderately* trained at D) he hates the rain and will do anything to get inside.

turns out Peppy and I had quite the love story, since every lost love country song has left me in a mess of tears.  cue sara evans.  Let's take a moment:

aw baby puppy when we first brought him home

This picture is like I had intuition that he would go missing.  It's very milk carton-esque.

Nesting Round 4

I'm really tired and really overwhelmed.  Which should tell you one thing: frantic.  When I'm feeling this way I start setting absurd and unattainable goals, such as needing to look like I live in a Martha Stewart home, make Martha Stewart sort of money (pre bankruptcy), and have Martha Stewart looking dinners and Martha Stewart craft times with my kids.  And I'll be damned if I don't make the Martha Stewart Walnut wreath before the end of November.  I'm damned.  MarthaIloveandhateyourdaily5emailstome.

Oh wait.  I forgot to mention.  I'm nesting.  And above paragraph has nothing to do with nesting.  Above paragraph is added to already innately nesting maternal crazies.  Heh.  I'm posting things on craigslist, making weekly trips to the SPCA, arranging Amvets pickups, dropping off at Salvation Army, and arranging junk removal with Shenandoah Junk Removal.  Because I. gots. junk.  And the house is still trashed.  Because I'm about one notch above motivated, and striking neither a negative score nor positive with discipline.  None better said than by Hitler, "Mein Kampf."  (I'm not sure how that becomes applicable in so many aspects of my life.) (Oh wait, yes I do know why, maybe I'm dramatic.)